Let’s get this straight: yes, it’s rare for someone who looks like Lupita Nyong’o to capture the Hollywood spotlight. However, don’t dare fall into the trap of thinking that someone who looks like her … is actually rare. READ MORE
“It’s funny that when a man hasn’t anything in the world to worry about, he goes off and gets married.” — Robert Frost
What the hell was I thinking?! I was 31, single, making good money, & living in Atlanta, a city that’s been described as “happy hunting” for a single guy. I was living the life my grandfather told me, as a small child, to live: “Why get married and try to make one woman happy … when you can stay single and make them all happy?” Granddad would have been proud. READ MORE
1) The engagement ring is worth every penny. It’s the one thing that will remind her of you every single day.
2) Don’t let your miserable married friends or your single friends give you marriage advice.
3) Stay in touch with her family without being prompted to do so.
4) Don’t ever put her in a position to have to track you down. She should always know where you are. You’re not “checking in.” You’re being considerate.
5) Don’t be annoyed, but appreciate when other men check out your wife or want to be around her. It’s a compliment to you.
6) Have a good relationship with her closest friend and her mom. They can be your best allies when you screw up.
7) Make sure she has a good relationship with your closest friends. She’ll need to call on them for help understanding you.
8) If she can’t cook when you marry her, she won’t be a good cook later.
9) Give her the password to your cellphone and your email. She might never use it, but she’ll feel better knowing you don’t mind her having it.
10) Get a secret email address she knows nothing about.
11) Holding hands never gets old.
12) Be warned: you’ll be minding your own business and an opportunity to cheat will present itself. Go home.
13) Don’t make her feel bad for hanging out with her girlfriends or wanting time away from you. She needs it.
14) Intimacy is critical. Sex won’t necessarily be.
15) Don’t set a particular night of the week as “date night.” It becomes a part of your schedule and routine like everything else. Rather, do as much as you can together whenever you can.
16) Kiss her every time you greet her and every time you leave her.
17) DO NOT under any circumstance talk to an ex-girlfriend without her knowledge.
18) When you’re mad at each other, try shutting up and sitting quietly in each other’s arms. It’ll do wonders.
19) No matter how good of a job you did on something, it could have been better if you asked for her help and input.
20) Don’t stop doing all the things you did to win her heart in the very beginning.
21) Before you get married, negotiate how many children you’re going to have.
22) After you have your first child, don’t dare suggest you don’t want to have another. (Despite what you might have already agreed to.)
23) Have a TV show you both love and discovered together. ”The Walking Dead” & “The Following” have done wonders for my marriage.
24) Every disagreement doesn’t need to be an argument.
25) Don’t just nod and say “uh huh” when she’s telling you about her day. Ask questions. It shows her you’re really listening.
26) Being in the same room but not doing the same thing can still be valuable time together.
27) Despite your best efforts, you will never clean the house to her satisfaction. Don’t be offended. (“Did you get behind the toilet?”)
28) After a while, you could care less if she talks to or about an ex-boyfriend. And some days, you’d be happy for him to take her off your hands.
Note: Though I gave Leonard Pitts of the Miami Herald proper attribution when I used his “close your eyes/thug” experiment while anchoring a newscast on MSNBC last week, I failed to do so during my “Katie” appearance.” My bad, Leonard!
I’m glad it wasn’t an interview. I’m glad I didn’t prep for my conversation with Jordan Davis’ parents with research and scripted questions. Instead, I got an unexpected opportunity to spend nearly a half hour having a heart-to-heart with Lucia McBath and Ron Davis.
McBath and Davis were featured guests on “The Katie Show” yesterday. I was there as a guest as well to talk to Katie Couric about the fallout from the case. When their segment was done, Davis’ parents sat in the front rown while I was interviewed. When I was done, I immediately went over to say hello to them, and we all ended up walking back to the green room together. We struck up a conversation, and parts of it I want to share. READ MORE